Over the last years I learned a lot about the importance of holding space.
Not only about creating space or offering safe spaces and places where people feel welcomed and comfortable.
The concept of “Holding space” goes much deeper:
To hold space happens on an energetic level, it means to be fully present, for one self and for others, without judgment, without rushing to fix, and without needing to control outcomes.
It is a skill that can be learned and an act of trust, patience, and compassion.
From Creating Physical Space to Holding Emotional Space
My journey began as an interior architect. I was trained to design and shape environments.
Later on, I learned to create places that support growth, comfort and human connection. I learned to understand how light, proportion, texture and materials not only create a beautiful space to the eye, but also how they can influence mood, behavior, and well being.
And over time, I realized that designing a physical space was only one part of the work.
Filling that space with a certain atmosphere and energy is another important task of design.
A task the leader of the place executes. The principles that lead to a well-crafted room: openness, balance, harmony, and intention, also apply to leadership.
Just as a room can be inviting or suffocating, a leader can create a space that feels safe, empowering, and alive, or one that stifles growth and creativity.
I learned that people, whether my team, my family, or our community, don’t always need the leader to have the answers. What they need is a safe, calm, and supportive space in which they can find clarity for themselves.
Through reflection, practice, and experience, I learned the importance to hold space emotionally and spiritually, not just physically.
Holding space is both an inner practice and an outer act:
- For others: It is creating trust, providing a calm atmosphere, and encouraging self-discovery. It is listening without interrupting, it is about keeping secrets, supporting without judging, without commenting or taking over, and it is empowering without controlling.
- For oneself: It is loving ourselves first; it is pausing, reflecting, praying, and tending to our own energy and boundaries. It is being kind to one self, keeping our own batteries well charged, and remembering that our presence matters more than our performance.
In essence, holding space is leadership from presence and alignment, not from hard work and effort.
It is a form of service, a living expression of mercy, patience, and sincerity; and, in my understanding, it is a subtle form of ‘ibadah, a devotional act of serving others in alignment with Divine guidance.
An Invitation to Everyone
Holding space is not reserved for “official” leaders. It is for anyone who interacts with others: as a mother, a colleague, a friend, or a volunteer.
Wherever you serve or are in contact with another, you can choose to create a space where people feel seen, heard, and respected.
This can be done through a hug, a sympathetic ear, the support you offer someone in mourning, a shoulder for someone else to cry on…
It begins with our selves: accepting our own need for quiet, for rest, for tenderness. Looking well after ourselves and taking care of our own needs.
And then it goes further in contact with other: a pause before speaking, a moment to truly listen, a breath before reacting.
It grows when we cultivate presence, patience, and faith in our daily lives. And it ripples outward, transforming relationships, teams, families, and communities.
For me, the journey from interior architect to leader who holds space has taught me humility, deepened my empathy, and reminded me that leadership is as much about being as it is about doing.
I hope this reflection inspires you to explore the art of holding space in your own life and watch as the space you hold becomes a sanctuary for growth, healing, and connection, for yourself and for all those around you.
Happy Start of November to all!
